Report 1: Night 1
Alcohol units: 07
Showers: 0
Jogs: 0
Kids alive: 3
We survived last night, although the sudden urge to go for a run at 3am woke us up, we resisted. Instead we dusted off and donned the gym kit that neither my wife nor I had used for the last 3 years, sat at the table and lamented that fact that although we didn’t normally go for a jog (it’s been 5 years?) it was, as Monty Python put it, our inalienable right to do so if we wanted.

Back to bed, my unused Nike’s still on. They can take away my right to run but not my choice to wear athleisure to bed. Wife went with yoga pants and a particularly fetching pair of 80’s leg warmers; 100% wool; warm but I dare say a bit scratchy since they hadn’t been used since that Jane Fonda party we attended some years back…how I do miss a themed gathering at this moment in time.
At 6am I had a chat with the dog. She needed to know that although I had intended to walk her this morning, just as I had intended to do so for the last three weeks, today was different. The government had said no. It was not my fault, I told her, I mean to be fair I said, I can’t even for for a jog and you know how much I love that!
She seemed okay with the idea of no walks, and equally as one should in times of lockdowns and the unknown, I promised to actively over communicate any changes in the Marshall law that seems to have descended upon us. At present she seems placated. 8am walk to work – no traffic to report other than 2 nerf guns, one lego block (yellow, 4 piece connector) and a discarded chip packet that one of my sons evidently thought delicately accentuated the slowly growing patina that is “lockdown mode”.
Fire off emails to clients telling them I am far to busy to interact today, I need all my focus on dealing with the fall out…remind them to sanitize, be safe and above all stay inside, after all I say, even I cannot go for a run right now and as a good citizen have rightfully chosen not to do so.
Open up YouTube.
Day one begins in earnest.
#coronadiary #survivalguide